Starting to Struggle

Dead-EndSome time ago there was this tv commercial of a guy surfing the internet. It depicted him flying through hundreds of different websites with this look of extreme boredom on his face. It didn’t matter what he clicked on, it didn’t matter what he saw, nothing the internet had to offer could perk his interest. Until finally he reaches the end, and a page pops up that says: “Alert: You have reached the end of the internet. You have seen everything there is to see. Please go back now.”

That is how I used to feel about the Bible. I used to think I knew everything there was to know, which I realize is pretty arrogant, so let me explain. It wasn’t that I knew everything, it was this feeling like I had heard or seen every take and explanation there was for any given piece of scripture. Almost like this stagnant knowledge of God and his Word. No matter what I read, no matter who I listened too, it didn’t seem like there wasn’t anything fresh or new to be learned.

About two years ago a friend began to show me just how wrong I was. He subtly and patiently began to teach me things about God and His word. Things I never knew existed. At first this fresh look at God’s word was as hard to accept as it was fascinating. I had spent so many years reading and understanding the Bible one way, that when something new was presented it seemed wrong. It had to be wrong. After all I KNEW the Bible, right? But it wasn’t wrong, I was wrong (imagine that). I have now come to see that God’s word is in fact a living and active story (Hebrews 4:12). And just like anything that is alive, you can’t predict with certainty what it is going to do.

This may sound like heresy to you. It would have to me two years ago. But this, in the middle of this uncertainty, is where I have come to know God more deeply than I ever thought possible. This is where I Struggle with God. But it’s not a struggle with His existence, or His love, or with the idea that Jesus Christ is His one true son. It is me struggling to allow God to be God and let the BIble be the Bible, and let them both reveal themselves to me as they truly are. As they were truly meant to be. It is a struggle that brings me closer to God, that makes me stronger in my faith, and ignites a fire of passion beneath me to know God more.

This blog is an invitation. An invitation for you to join me in my journey as I rediscover the one true God. To begin reading, and living God’s story like you never thought possible. To approach God’s word with an open mind and be willing to see and hear things differently. This is an invitation to begin Struggling with God.


Posted on by Steven Smith in Struggles Leave a comment

About the author

Steven Smith

Steven enjoys sharing God's Word through speaking, teaching, and writing. He currently serves as the Youth Minister at Fairmont Park Church of Christ in Midland, Texas, and has been working in the church since 2001. He is married to his beautiful bride Celeste Smith and they have two wonderful daughters. In his spare time Steven enjoys spending time with his family, Skiing, Backpacking, Hiking, Paddling, and Camping.

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